How to hang with Faderhead
I don’t care much about the backstage area. That’s why after the gigs I can usually be found somewhere in the club, having a drink or ten. This usually results in people coming up to me to have a chat, take a photo or get something signed. I love that, really, but for a while there have been a few things that bugged me (some of them bug me a lot). So here’s a few general things to consider:
1) BE PATIENT
If I’m talking to someone else, please wait!! This is not the “Office of Faderhead Affairs”, you don’t have an appointment at a predetermined time and I don’t owe you anything. DO NOT poke me on my shoulder! I don’t know you, I am busy talking and you are being rude. Most likely there are 5-25 other people in line waiting and you just tried to skip them all. Which is especially rude.
2) DO NOT POKE ME
Again, if I am talking to someone else, DO NOT INTERRUPT. If it takes too long for you, come back later. If you do poke me, I will most likely tell you to fuck off – or just hold up my hand and let you talk to the hand (cause the face ain’t listening). It’s just common courtesy and common sense. Then again, if sense was common, more people would have it …
3) DO NOT GIVE ME YOUR CD
I’m sorry, if you are in an electronic project/band, don’t give me your CD. Actually, don’t even tell me about it. I don’t listen to electronic music at home and I won’t listen to your CD. No offense, but that’s how it is. Keep the CD and give it to someone who actually WANTS it. Other problem: where am I gonna put it? I have a glas in one hand and a pen to sign things in the other hand (or a girl, or a phone) – please don’t expect me to trade pen/girl/phone for your CD that I don’t want. That’s simple logistics at work for ya!
4) DON’T ASK ME ABOUT THE SOFTWARE I USE
I use what everyone else uses a DAW (Cubase 5) and VSTis (Battery, Omnisphere, Vanguard, Trilogy, Kontakt, etc.) and it does not really matter. If I made a song with other stuff, it’d still sound like Faderhead. This is a really boring topic to me. And especially don’t tell me that you are a great producers who’s been producing for 10 years and your music is fuckin’ awesome. How come Krischan Wesenberg or Daniel Myer don’t know you and your songs are still on the CD-R that you’ve been trying to give me then? ;))))
5) DON’T ASK ME TO GIVE YOU SOME OF MY VODKA
We are in a club. There’s a bar. Buy it yourself, cheap-ass! :)
6) BUY ME A DRINK INSTEAD
On the 15 shows of the US tour, only one (!) person (Lizz!), was kind enough to ask me if she could buy me a drink. Everyone else just asked me for stuff. I’m not complaining at all, but guess who the person was that I wanted to hang with for the rest of that evening? I’m not asking all of you to buy me a drink here, I’m just trying to illustrate how human interaction works …
EDIT: This pertains to the “introduction” or “first meeting” – I’m not talking about people who I’ve been talking to for a while! Thanks to all of those who bought/brought me drinks :)
7) DON’T JUST STAND IN THE DISTANCE AND STARE
I don’t know how often this happens, but quite a lot (last time in Cincinnati with the pretty, blonde girl in the KMFDM shirt)! When I’m talking to people and/or signing stuff, don’t stand far away and stare over. There’s no chance in hell, I’m gonna leave all the fans there and walk over to you. I like most of my fans and if they were first, they are first. If you want to talk/hang out/get something signed: COME OVER and say hi! And don’t bitch on me on Facebook a week later for “Letting fans down/Not caring about fans!” etc. simply because you couldn’t remove yourself from your spot …
8) DON’T TELL ME MY FRIENDS SUCK
I like them and I don’t know you. If you talk shit about people I’m with or people I know, don’t expect me to a) listen to you, b) believe you and c) like you. People talk unsubstantiated bullshit about me all the time, what makes you believe I care about the crap you have to say? Girls: don’t tell me that the girl I’m hanging out with is a slut/ugly/stupid/psycho – I’m a grown man, I’ll figure it out myself – bitching just makes you look bitter ;)
9) DON’T INTERRUPT ME BEFORE THE SHOW
If you see me walk through the club before the show, please don’t ask me for a picture/autograph. I am probably trying to get from point A to point B as quickly as possible to get something done that needs to get done. I’m trying to get ready to do the best show I can and I’ll be there in the club after the show, I promise! :)
10) DON’T TRY TO START A CONVERSATION ON/NEAR THE DANCEFLOOR
If I’m in the club/dancefloor-area, chances are I won’t be able to hear 80% of what you are saying cause it’s SIMPLY TOO LOUD.
11) KNOW HOW TO OPERATE YOUR CAMERA
Please, for the love of god, there’s 30 people waiting behind you, you want to take a picture and then you DON’T EVEN HAVE A CAMERA?????? HOW ARE YOU GONNA TAKE A PIC?? :) Hahaha, that was the most bizarre situation in Philly, really. So what I am trying to say here is: bring a camera. If you only have a cellphone, make sure it has a flash and the flash is activated (otherwise your picture will be … dark). If you are waiting for 5 minutes anyway, please figure out how to switch it on beforehand. It’s just polite to the people waiting behind you!
You’d think that one wouldn’t have to say these things, but if this and more happens 5-10 times a night, I lose interest in hanging out in the club. And I don’t want that. Sooooo, as always after the shows: come by, say hi, take pictures, get CDs signed and tell me cool stories or interesting bits (I’m not too interested in iPhone apps, so those don’t fall in the “interesting bits” category). :)
Oh, and if I ask you to write me an email, DO IT. Don’t assume I don’t mean it.
I think you’re going to get a lot people buying you drinks now :) hope I can be one of them! on your second leg through TX perhaps?
Haha, that’s why I wrote “Don’t buy me drinks!!!” all of a sudden. But if you do, buy vodka on the rocks. Preferrably not bottom-of-the-barrel :D
I totally would have bought you a drink in Philly but by that time you had a swarm of people around you and I didn’t want to bother you again ><
I met you at The Shelter in Atlanta. I must say not only was I impressed with your music, I like who you are personally. Your “how to hang rules” are reasonable and it makes me like you more. Take care and I hope to see you in Atlanta again.
Stef: no worries :)
Jennifer: Thanks. Atlanta was the show where I was really grumpy and we left quickly cause Z_Marr of Combichrist offered to give us a lift to the hotel.
After watching you do the “talk to the hand” (does anyone actually even do that anymore?) thing to the PROMOTER of the show after your performance in my city, I think a lot of us decided you weren’t much worth the effort to try to get to know better… much less buy a drink.
You’re a public figure, and for the few hours you are at the concert/club you are on display. Welcome to celebrity. If you act like a dick we remember it. If you don’t, we remember it too. The comparison between you and the other acts was remarkable enough that people are still commenting about it here. They hung out and had fun and seemed to enjoy the attention and the fans. And in doing so gained quite a few more fans.
You? Not so much.
Morphire:
What show and what situation was that?
A lot of promoters are assholes (fortunately on this tour most of the ones we had were great!) and just because they put on the show doesn’t mean that they a) did a good job, b) treated the band well and c) weren’t interrupting something that didn’t require their participation. Actually, MOST of the time the promoter/club owner is the biggest asshole in the whole club …
Being a public figure doesn’t mean I have to take shit from anyone. It also doesn’t mean that I am “required” to hang with people in the club after the show. If that means losing fans, so be it.
And I don’t actually do the “Talk to the hand” thing. I just lift up my hand because telling someone in a club to wait (or shut up) over the loud music is futile …
Two questions here.
One: Why isn’t “Bring your own pen” listed? I have seen quite a lot of bands who prefer the person who wants something signed to bring their own pen. I do so too, it just makes things smoother and more pleasant.
Second: How do you feel about people speaking German to you? Would you prefer that or English? Or does it matter at all?
Toby: I usually have my own pen. People just forget and since I want to be accomodating, I just carry a sharpie in my pocket. I speak English and German fluently, I don’t care what language we speak :)
I had the PLEASURE of meeting you in Cincinnati. I didn’t get the chance to speak to you much, but did get a quick picture with you. You were very outgoing and polite, but I didn’t ask you any stupid questions either ;) It was a very memorable and pleasant 2 minutes that meant a lot to me. I shall buy you 2 drinks the next time you come my way.
P.s. You also answered my e-mail pretty damn fast before the tour even started, I appreciated that.
Realize that in the city where you are playing, that promoter likely put his ass on the line financially and time-wise to put on a show. Asshole or not, show some respect for this person that made it possible for you to get paid for what you like doing. Likely that promotor is friends with about everyone in that club/scene/city that you want to market your music to. If we see you being a dick to him especially, it doesn’t do much for your image or our desire to want to see you again or support your music.
No one is saying that you have to hang with anyone. Just be polite about it. The ones that “get it” hang out and have fun and have a good time with their fans. The ones that don’t, make up rules for how to properly hang with them. What are we? in grade school again?
I saw the promoter walk up to you after the show was over and before the first word was out of his mouth I watched you put your palm in his face and stalk off. Call it whatever you like, it was rude as hell and turned off a lot of us that saw you do it. If you are comfortable being a dick and losing fans in the process then go for it. I thought the idea was something different when you were in the music business. What do I know? I just buy the music and go to the shows that help pay for your vodka on the rocks.
You still didn’t say what city that supposedly happened in … so as far as I am concerned you are making it up.
Its impossible to make everyone happy all of the time. <— great quote for both sides of the fence here.
Really? Seriously now, how old are you?
Does the city matter? Really? If I told you a city, would it change everything and somehow make it all believable in your head? Would it change anything about how you work or act? I highly doubt it. All me telling you the city would do is point you at a particular promotor that I bet you’d then take it out on. Considering I’m not involving him in this discussion or speaking for him in any way, it seems inappropriate to point him out.
Look at the behavior I’ve described. Does it sound like something you’ve done or do? Or does it sound atypical of you? You even enumerate it as something you do in your rules above. Still think I’m making it up?
Tammy: definitely :)
Morphire: Yes it matters. You come across as someone who complains for the sake of complaining.
And it does indeed sound like very atypical behavior for me unless you are annoying and disturbing a situation (see my blog post). Also, and you can’t know that cause all you know of me is one live show: if I ever motion for someone to wait I will usually apologize to them afterwards and ask them to not take it personally. But sometimes other things are more important.
Funny info for you: the only promoter who didn’t say that he’d like me to come back was in Atlanta. And that was probably because we left so early and didn’t get a chance to say goodbye …
Yeah the promotor in Atlanta likely said that for that specific reason I bet. I’m pretty certain that’s the reason.
I would also like to thank you for being super-nice to everyone in Cincinnati, myself included. Some of us get a little star-struck meeting people for the first time and I found you absolutely charming. Next time we cross paths, I’ll think about buying you a drink :p
I agree with that you shouldn’t have to write down things that ought to be common sense, but it’s surprising what people see as appropriate behavior. Just as a person being in a club, I feel the same way about people interrupting me or trying to chat on the dance floor. Especially if I’m dancing. How does that make sense?
That being said, you were great to talk to in NYC! I know the crowd there wasn’t great and didn’t really give you guys the interaction/dancing/fun-having I think you deserved, but you were still friendly and welcoming to the fans. Im guilty of talking to you before you went on (whoops!) but I was worried I’d miss my chance!
Though I totally forgot to bring a sharpie to have you sign something :(
Sir FaderHead! I hope our fans in Philly were to your liking! Except for the one who didnt know how to use there camera lol Im sure they will learn from that experience!
See, I should have bought you a drink. I bought AP a glass of Chopin (fine ass vodka if you have not had it), told me I was the only person to do so, but he was too trashed to remember. Still don’t regret it though.
Richmond show was awesome, thanks for making it great.
When I met you in NYC you were lovely, and I even thanked you for being so kind to a friend of mine in Baton Rouge a few nights earlier.
The only reason I didn’t offer to buy you a drink is you had one in your hand at the time. But I will happily buy you one next time you are in town.
I want to note to everyone else reading that during the show, he accidentally kicked (not hard, it was just an accident of turning around) the guy next to me, and by reflex stopped and apologized mid-sentence. That’s not the sign of a rude person.
I don’t think there’s anything unreasonable about any of this. I’d just add that you’re human and sometimes you’re having a bad day just like everyone else, and no one is perfect. If everyone is patient with everyone else, generally things work out just fine.
we met at the shelter in atl. you already had a drink in your hand but i did already promise i would get ya drinks when you come back. i also still have some pics from the show if you were at all interested in them. sorry you were grumpy that night. but the show was awesome. even if i felt like i was the only one dancing… so thanx for the shout out.
HeyHo :) be sure: I will NEVER EVER will buy you a vodka – you know why: I can imagine how you feel at the morning after…. :p
And NO CD offering allowed? – How about a vinyl instead? (ok…aaaafter I has be to GE shortly to get some “red sand”….hehe)
Lucky me I use an Android phone ;)
Seriously: it made me a bit sad that I had to read your statement. All those words are more than true and all that you wrote should be really taken for granted.
Sheer lunacy that those things happen thaaat often to you the nights…
(btw: I enjoy going backstage: Not to talk but to get a short snack and then go back to the dance-floor :D )
I would wonder if there is a big difference in the behaviour of the American and the European fans.
Have a nice weekend!
Greetz, Diti
oooops:
Daaaaamn: “aaaafter I has to be to” is rubbish. It had to be:”aaaaafter I have been to” ;)
dhg
I was lucky enough to meet you at the Atlanta show & said it then, I figured for a douche & while you might be a douche, you are a kick ass douche & I fully hope you keep doing what you are doing. Thanks for being up front & honest about it all, that’s what makes you a real person. Fuck celebrity if you can’t be a person first.
I sincerely hope the Atlanta promoter just missed you that night because I would chop off a pinky finger to have you come back.
I feel like a lousy douche fan for not buying you a drink though. If and when we meet again, I’ll buy you two.
Thanks again for being an awesome douche.
Fuck you Sami I bought you way more than 1 drink when you were on tour in the US
Heh….kinda sad that you needed to do this in the first place, some people in this scene not only have no idea of “boundaries”, but seem to be more generally socially retarded with not much in the way of basic savvy..
Sure, if you go to a club/aftershow, you’re expecting to be approached by a high percentage of the people there; most of them probably saw the show (and presumably enjoyed it a lot if my experience is a guide ;p), and want to meet you or get something signed etc, but that still doesn’t give them the right to some of the behaviour above. Rude is rude, whether you’re a “star” or just a “regular punter” – it’s easy to be tempted to say “Oh, Sami’s just being a big egomaniac dick” etc, but it’s just as egotistical of a fan to assume that after travelling, hassles, gigging, and everything else, that the whole purpose of *your* night was to sign their concert ticket. 0_o
Anyway, I personally didn’t really get to talk to ya when you were in Dublin, as I was DJing at the aftershow and busy myself, and also because I tend to follow your basic rules no matter who it is. I think I did tell you I was a fan and welcome you to Dublin, but someone else wanted a piece of you then so I buggered off…would have offered to buy ya a drink too except I was skint. ;p
I did get to chat to Marco for a few minutes though, which was very cool. he’s a fun and interesting guy.
Come back to Dublin again soon, ok? ;)
These sound perfectly reasonable and it was great meeting you, I hope I didn’t bother you when I was grabbing your attention after the show after you were done talking to someone else by the door at the Rochester show to get a pic with you. I thought you were pretty laid back and perfectly reasonable about it all really. It was great to see you live and I hope to see you again! Good to hear that the tour was good and hope the travel wasn’t too exhaustin. :) ( also hope you got better from whatever it was you had at the time, real quick like )
Take care!
-Amber
Hey I bought you plenty of drinks and at more than one show not to mention I bought them for Marco as well. Bought you the first one from the crowd in Columbus, and then bought you and Marco the ones you guys had onstage in Springfield so you can’t say only one person bought you a drink.
It saddens me that you have to spell out for people what is and isn’t acceptable behaviour, but apparently some of the basics just aren’t being taught any more.
After a show I was at I had the opportunity to see you tell some douche bag to fuck off for interrupting/attempting to hug you/pushing past others to get your immediate attention.
I have to say, I wanted to stand an applaud what I saw. You were bang on the money when you told him how rude he was being. Once that was finished with we continued to talk for a bit until it became apparent that a group of kids had been waiting quietly for a few minutes, at which time you excused yourself from our conversation so that you could show them some attention.
Contrary to some who posted before me, I was impressed by how well you stand up for what you consider polite behaviour. I think that by making it explicit what you expect, I think you stand to improve your fan base, especially in the demographic of people who can read and think effectively about what they have read.
Also, I bought you (and the Lord) a drink just before the “Short Bus After Party ;)
OMG really? Haha Who ARE you? I opened this page because someone on Twitter posted the link calling you a f-ing douchebag. She’s right, you need to be grateful that anyone gives a shit about you! Wow! Diva much?
Samantha: what I meant by that was that only one person introduced her-/himself by “Hi, I’m Lizz, can I buy you a drink!” … I didn’t mean during the course of an already happening conversation. I guess I worded it badly. My fault :)
I Cannot believe one of my favorite artists is such an asshole. I will never try and make it to one of your shows now. What a crappy way to treat people who are excited to meet you. I Have to admit, when I love an artist and I get to meet them, I’m not thinking about “Waiting my turn” Or staying calm. It’s supposed to be nuts after you get done performing, not “HEY everyone shut the fuck up, let me talk, and don’t touch me” I Really am very saddened to see your “Rules” Here. Really man, WTF did your fans do to deserve such brutal treatment? “Don’t talk to me on the floor” Dude, what if that’s the only place someone feels they can catch a second with you? Again what a SHITTY way to treat your fans “Oh fuck you, and fuck that I’m not gonna take the extra 2 seconds to try and hear you talk, you ARE NOT important enough for me to bend closer and listen” You made me sad Dx
Sam:
1) If you talk to me and some asshole jumps on me and yells in my ear to get attention, you’d be the first person to be pissed/annoyed/disappointed if I turned around and left you standing there for that other person. Especially if you just drove 400 miles from El Paso to Phoenix.
2) It’s not “supposed to be nuts”, I don’t know what world you live in. I guess you’ve never been surrounded by people who want something from you at the same time. I try to accomodate everyone and I would prefer not to sit at an official signing table or in a VIP area – or shielded by my tourmanager who creates a line out of the people and makes everything more factory-esque
3) Stop projecting your (apparently) butt-hurt emotions into what I wrote. I never said “Don’t talk to me on the floor”. I said “Don’t try to start a conversation on the dancefloor/near the speakers”. The amount of people who want to start a conversation right in front of the speakers is insane … It happens all the time, I don’t mind, but people quickly figure out that neither them nor me can hear each other speak and they’d have been better off saying the exact same thing by the bar. It’s really simple. Or another perspective for you: maybe I just yelled my ass off for 90 minutes, signed stuff for 90 minutes and just want to hang out and check out a track for a few minutes?
And let me be “such an asshole” again: If it makes you sad that I would like to actually talk to people who like my music in a civilized manner and give as many people as possible time, then I can totally do without you as a fan. Cause as a smart person once said “If there’s any reason for not liking a musician other than the quality of his music deteriorating, then you have never been a real fan anyway!”.
1- I Understand trying to talk and getting bombarded by other people. It’s annoying. But it’s still no way to tell people to “Fuck Off” Usually my answer would be, “Hang on a sec”
2- Yeah actually, I have. I Used to be a GOGO Dancer in Houston and I’ve ton a lot of HUGE shows for great DJs and have been totally bombarded with people when down in the crowd…It’s part of the gig “OMG Your clothes/hair/dancing” “What’s (Insert artist name here) like?” “Are they cool, did you get to meet them” Or any other obnoxious bullshit that drunk people like to talk about, which never bothered me, again part of the gig to cater to the people there.
3- You didn’t even say anything in a nice tone though, sir. You projected total Assholeness about everything you wrote. Not saying things like “Hey if you guys would please NOT try and yell at me in front of the speakers” It was “Don’t talk to me on the dance floor”
So yeah. Do you not miss the small shows you played in the beginning? How crazy it was and how much people REALLY meant to you? I Understand you do tours, and large venues now, But come on man, Most of us will only get to see you once and people like me get too excited about it. Sorry if loving fans irritate you.
well I just wanted to say that you performed really well in philly, and you being there made my whole night, cause you’re one of my favorite artist’s.sorry i didn’t get to meet you, hopefully next time you come around! (:
Sam: I am sorry, but I don’t think you’ve read anything I wrote … at least it seems like that from your answers. Everything you write is basically based on what you *think* I wrote …
Loving fans don’t irritate me. Assholes who demand attention despite the fact that 5 other people waited longer than them, do.
“Nice tone” never works in making the people aware of something that annoys you. This post is not about 95% of the folks I meet in a club. It’s about the other 5% … especially 1, 2, 5, 8 and 9.
I, unfortunately, didn’t get to meet you here in Cincy. I was next in line and my fiancee was asking if you could take a quick pic and you held up your hand and said you’d be around after the show and took off. I was quite upset. I’d been begging our promoter (and friend) to bring you here to Cincy, and 2 years later there you were.
He was going to bring me to you during AP, but I couldn’t let myself miss their show. Plus the promoter was piss drunk anyhow and probably had no idea what I asked of him.
Anyhow, I got to see the show I’d been waiting years for, so at least I can say that. Got a t-shirt and such, and stood in the vicinity of you so I guess that’s all I get. I can live with that.
Hope you come around to Cincy again some day.
as far as i can rememeber in madrid you didn´t get only drinks from fans but also something else! ;-) btw, was nice meeting you!
Hey Almu, I remember that quite fondly :))
It is really sad that people can’t comprehend that you are human as well (although sometimes I am sure hard for them to believe) and feel they can behave how ever they want and expect you to not respond accordingly…I had a chance to meet you in New York like some others have mentioned and found you were lovely and quite personable. Then again, I myself was polite, waited, knew how to act properly and made sure my camera worked for not only the first picture but the three pictures you offered to take with me. Was glad we met that day and look forward to any future opportunities next time in the States.
Jen S: next time in Cinci :) I love how Ilan runs Quorum and the crowd there was awesome, so we’ll definitely be back! :)
Some of these people are ridiculous with they way they’re attacking you.
You were one of the sweetest celebrities I’ve ever met, but maybe because when you were mid-conversation with a friend of mine and looked past him to me and motioned me over to call me out as “you posted on my facebook.. you’re Stefani, right?” it made me a bit flustered that /you/ knew who /i/ was. :)
I hope you come back to the US soon, and hopefully Philly won’t be your last stop so that you can have full energy and be able to handle us a little better ^^
Don’t listen to the haters. Just do what you do best and that’s being you.
What’s your favourite type of Vodka? That way I’m prepared for your return ;)
If there hadn’t been so many people and I could have spotted you, I would have bought you jagermeister shots, or vodka. :) You were so sweet on stage.
Next time your in Philadelphia, let me know. We can go get drunk. ;}
I think these “rules” are pretty reasonable.
And I don’t think you are an asshole for making them.
I’d definitely go to another one of your shows next time you’re in LA again. Even if you did call me a “stupid girl”. ;D
I probably called you that ironically … :)
Hey Sami, thanks for playing an awesome show! it was great meeting you at the Philly show, after you played. i thought you were very nice and a sweet person! i hope you had a good time in Philly, next time you come ill buy you a drink and well have some good vodka drinks, becuz i love my Vodka! IF you want i can send you the photos of us and the one of you and my friend danielle too! don’t let anyone call you names because you are an awesome person, and i understand what you meant with your rules! i can’t wait to see you soon again~! <3
Hey guys? Let’s not make assumptions as to what, “the promoter from Atlanta” would have said as I’m sure he (*cough*me*cough*) never even got a chance to talk to the bands before their departure with everything going on. They really did jet out of there fairly quickly without saying goodbye (..which I initially took as being pretty rude, honestly…)
With that being said — all bands were super-cool, professional (albeit super-late to the venue. Hellooooo stress!!!), friendly, and easy to deal with. As a personal *FAN* of all bands on the bill that night, I had no complaints with any performances — and yes, would indeed have Faderhead back in my club. Next time, hopefully they’ll say bye… ;-)
~Nathaniel / DJ Aesthetic
No matter what you post or how you act, you’re still in a dance club/bar with a bunch of drunk fans. Expect the rules to get broken routinely.
Well, I’ve met Sammi before a few times, and all I can say is what a nice sweet guy you are :) The fact that these rules have had to be posted up demonstrate a man who has tried many times, politely, to get these messages across, and failed.
There is no excuse for poor manners EVER. Modern society has changed so much since when I was young, teenagers and young people do not seem to have the respect for other people that should come as second nature. If you treat someone kindly, they should do the same in return.
Hence, if some belligerent plebeian decides to jump the queue, then fair play to Sammi for putting them in their place. A lot of these replies seem to be taking Sammi’s remarks too personally – he’s already said it is not a personal thing if he asks you to wait or come back later!
Honestly, this really just came off as an unjustified rant from someone who doesn’t totally appreciate their fans and thinks they’re important enough that they can be rude to people and get away with it.
I’m a performing artist. I am always, always, ALWAYS polite to my fans. Why? They come to shows and make me money. They feed my table and my desire to perform. I am always willing to talk to them, to sign stuff if they want, to hand them my card and say “email me anytime,” and to appreciate their praise. Is there some reason why you can’t do the same? If my fans are obnoxious or rude, I do what everyone should do – I ignore it, and they get their turn same as everyone else, even if I’m not quite as warm to them as I am to everyone else. Why? They walked in the door, paid the cover, and thus paid me. They deserve to be appreciated for their support, whether they’re douchebags elsewhere or not.
I have remembered every single musician who was a dick to me – and the end result was that I never went to another show of theirs again. Every single musician I’ve met who was nice to me got me to show up at every one of their shows as was humanly possible – from small-time local bands to international headliners. This is just self-entitled rambling from a spoiled, pretentious brat who thinks that because they’re popular in a tiny pond of music they have the right to post obnoxious shit like this, or even be rude to their fans. In short – the ruder you are to your fans, the less successful you will guarantee yourself to be – especially in a scene as small as this one.
Yo homeboy, you played yourself. Ice-T got some advice for ya:
“Guess who controls your destiny, fans, But you diss ‘em cos you think you’re a star, That attitude is rude, you won’t get far, Cos they’ll turn on you quick, you’ll drop like a brick, Unemployment’s where you’ll sit, No friends cos you dissed ‘em too, No money, no crew, you’re through”.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d7gkD5uyl-U
Dave Vendetta: yo homeboy, way to comprehend stuff that is written on a blog: I don’t diss my fans – I diss the people who are annoying and disrespectful while I spend time with my fans. If they want to be like that. Fuck them, I’ll make do without them. They probably Piratebay anyway … oh and Ice-T is also the same guy who said “Fuck all the haters who think that they own you, keep your head up high and stand up for what you do!”.
Tattooed_Mezzosoprano: again, if you’d actually read my blog post, you’d see that I am bitching about people who take time away from me being polite towards my fans. I totally agree with everything you say, except for the fact that it simply is impossible to just ignore people who are really obnoxious (as you like to do). Oh wait, by telling them to wait and further ignoring them I am being “rude” and “a spoiled brat”, I forgot. Double standards much? ;)
you ruined industrial music. thanks a lot asshole.
Is it wrong that “Fuck What You Heard” started playing in my head when I read this? Ha.
Anyway, I think it’s good to know how people like to be approached. i’ve missed personally meeting some awesome musical acts just because when they showed up to the club or after party they get mobbed by everyone in the place, making it basically impossible for ANYONE to say hi or get autographs or photos because it turns into a clusterfuck.
maybe this blog post should be titled How To Hang With Anybody. Nobody likes to be interrupted, poked or creepily started at by strangers.
Hmmm a lot of the people who are complaining here seem to be complaining about the fact that you like to finish a conversation with someone else before starting a conversation with the next person…whats wrong with that?
Faderhead is a pretty big band / artist in the “scene”, and a post like this isn’t unjustified – most artists probably don’t even take the time out to talk to their fans, so when one does its fine for there to be certain guidelines – at least its not things like don’t stand within 10 metres of me, ALWAYS buy me a drink etc.
I met you at Scala once, opened a door and there you was, i was so shocked about how incredibly lovely you are and got some really nice pics with you :) ALSO saw you at slimes, where you poured vodka over me and some other saucy girl dancing at the front…apparently you do share vodka after all ;)
Hmmm…I don’t understand why there is still a discussion about politeness. FH’s statements are more than understandable (maybe a bit toooo directly-into-the-face?) if you ever have taken a look “behind the ccurtain” of a rockstar’s life….
I’ve been to a club yesterday (errr… “-night”) and met a bunch of peeps I know and like (including the frontman of a very well known Swiss gothic-band) – but there was no “deeper going” conversation possible because of the many decibels around…. (nevertheless did it take me 1,5 hours from the entrance to the dancefloor :D )
To set the focus on somethin different ;)
4) the software issue: This is a oint I only agree in the main points (discussions about DAWs are useless), but talking ’bout VSTs: As I have my favourite ones, too, I find it nevertheless interesting if one would recommend one to me (and vice versa :) ) because of special reasons – I never find it bad to enhance my knowledge/experiences and try out something new (hmpf…bad English…hope you understand it nevertheless). Besides that it’s rubbish to talk about that the whole evening… ;)
Lookin forward to a “HTH w/ Faderhead”-song ;D
many greetz – lookin forward to meet you at the WGT (maybe….)
Diti
Haha, I find this hilarious!
I just read through all the comments, and I find it funny how people are so rude to you!
I love your music, and I really don’t see the problem in your blog.
All you are asking for is just that people treat you normally – that people are polite.
That is not dissing your fans or telling people to fuck off, that’s just asking people to be polite!
I have not had the pleasure of seing you live yet, but I really hope one day I will, so I can meet you in person!
But seriously guys, take a chill pill; he’s a person.
And ‘gman’: why are you reading this blog if you don’t like his music? o.O
I think this is kinda funny. I had no idea who you were till some folks called you a jerk. LOL I guess there really is no such thing as bad publicity. I gave your music a listen and I really dig it. I think I will play a couple of your songs at the club where I work tonight. Thanks for making great dance tunes.
I agree with you. I do not think you are asking too much to expect basic consideration. I thank you,your band mates and other musicians like you for what you do. I’ve picked up on other musicians being disappointed with bad behavior of spectators/fans. I know dj’s endure some of the same issues. This is not to say all fans are misbehaving or annoying. Sure, people get drunk and self-control, respectful consideration of others is dismissed in the way-lay. I find your point of view & request truly reasonable, respectful and honest. I’ve often wondered when musicians of your music genre would reach out and speak up about this. It’s good that you have. In my opinion, if people want to forget how NOT to be stupid, inconsiderate, less-than-intelligent jerks, then based on the constant news reports we all hear, the gangsta-rap ass-hattery scene is all the welcoming, slobbering rage – the rest of us are happy to avoid.
I’ll say it again.
Thank you.
I have experienced different music artist’s emotions during gigs, as well as the crowds and have been watching the continuous on-going of fans vs artist here and I hope things can be cooled (and I don’t act like petrol towards a fire >.<).
I think what must be said is… from what I have gathered FH and AP were touring with barely or no time to take a break for a few days, whilst having to perform for paying individuals that had gone to see them.
They haven’t experienced major problems before, i assume in being with the crowd otherwise people would have wrote about it in Europe. Thus being quite energy stricken from continuous touring, having to perform for paying people, deal with any business agendas that may pop up with artist and event holder; you may see why Public relations may be running a little close to ice….Ergo as some sort of end on terms could it be said that maybe some fans reacted too much like excited plutonium towards a hot uranium reactor?
And if that isn't conciliation bands can sometimes be crap live and PR also, though make great music I may not go to see them again… but if it makes my hairs stand up on my arms and I have that feeling of immense happiness that music only makes, I will still listen to them, and buy their discs. We aren’t perfect, we are only human and we all make mistakes.
Hi Dominic,
well thought, but my blog post really has nothing to do with any of what you mentioned. For over a year, I’ve been pissed off by fans trying to cut into conversations with other fans. It happens more in Europe, simply because usually the crowds are bigger in Europe than in the US, and it’s just a matter of bad manners. Nothing more, nothing less. :)
dude i was lucky enough to get to hang with you at your hotel after your show at skullys in columbus and got pic with you in cincy…you guys are cool as hell loved both shows and those seem like pretty common sense ways to be… though most people dont have it.. cant wait till the next time you are close to columbus
I met you at Resistanze.
I said ‘Hey’ you said ‘Hey’ n shook hands!
What more could I ask for? You were heading to the backstage area, otherwise I would have offered you a drink!
Ignore the nay-sayers on here!
I met you at the afterparty in dallas at one of the bars I DJ at. I totally understand what you are saying. Being a DJ getting hounded all night to play song after song gets annoying too. People bitching to play their song over and over gets old quick. I’ve been Djing and playing live in my bands (that Daniel Myers DO know LOL) for over 20 years now and I concur that rude ass people suck!
oh BTW, glad you enjoyed the Metllica mashups I was spinning!!
^ thus why you should come to the US more often!
You still didn’t tell me your favourite Vodka :P
http://cheezburger.com/operation-magpie/lolz/View/4843915264
Hey there!
I – am – so – sorry for “just staring” at the Christmasball in Würzburg last year. I didn’t know you hate beeing stared at and I already had everything signed that was signable XD but I was just worried, ’cause you were quiet drunk and I didn’t want you to fall against something and get hurt, so I stayed near and stared. I’m sorry. Didn’t mean it.
Anyways: I love your attitude towards clubbing and hanging out with fans. Really <3 that's the best and you're one of the very few who do things like that. So on WGT I didn't find you (but searched for 40 min XD what was quiet funny and I do not complain at all XD I was done 'cause of the show anyways XD) but if I'll meet you anywhere else somewhen – then I'll totally know how to behave then! :D :D
(But like you said: Most of this should be self-evident)
So see you! <3
It’s funny. There are always people who don’t know the difference between offence and politeness just because they are the ones that didn’t get what they wanted.
Folks, please understand these rules as what they are:
An attempt to make things easier. A reminder of what your sense of politeness should tell you whenever you get in contact with someone you don’t know. These rules are FOR you, not AGAINST you.
Being Faderhead means being honest. If you can’t handle honesty you should probably change your point of view or go back to the lands of deception and selfishness where bands talk bad of you as soon as you turn your back on them.
Sami,
you are one of the nicest, friendliest, politest, most awesome and – above all – most honest people I’ve ever met in my life. I enjoy spending time with you a lot, I did from the start.
I like you exactly as you are and the good thing is, I know exactly you will always be you – fortunately!
Your friend forever,
Das Portal :-*
hey sami, how are you doing? just wanted to know where i can send you the photos from the philly show of us, or you can go on my facebook page and its under the Faderhead Folder! anyways, i hope your having a good week, don’t let anyone else tell you that you suck. your a great person! Keep on rockin’ <3
Bloody hell. I actually got a post about this blog entry on my Facebook from someone who doesn’t even listen to your music…that’s how overblown this whole thing has become. Jesus. I love Faderhead/Sami (purely Platonic, I don’t want to be hurt…ha ha), and he seems to really care about his fans, despite some people reading these blog points in a more negative than necessary light. I’ve only had one opportunity to see him live (Springfield, VA), and he seemed pretty busy pregig, and post. Would I have liked to buy him a drink and say, “Hi?” Of course! That was the initial plan. However, I don’t want to bother people who are technically working by jumping in at a time that could probably easily be perceived as inopportune. I paid for a show, I got it, end of transaction. I carry over most, if not all of the bulletpoints in this blog into *every* social interaction…celebrity or no. This entry is more than reasonable when you take into account his admission that it’s aimed a rude 5% of the people at his shows.
Bottom line, for this humble Virginian: Thanks for the tunes & the show Sami. Maybe at some return trip in the future I can meet you for real and buy you a drink. I’ll be sure to introduce myself by poking you with my demo CD on the dancefloor just before the show. ;)
First of all: I agree whole-heartedly with the majority of this blog. You said some things that truly needed to be said, and I applaud you for being ballsy enough to do so.
Now then:
I think I love the “Don’t Talk To Me Preshow”/”Don’t Talk to Me On The Floor” duo is amazing. I haven’t been to a show in ages that took place in a venue that had a nice, quiet room to go into and talk to the artist. The bar is typically a stone’s toss from the floor. If they can’t talk to you pre-show and they can’t talk to you when it’s loud, when do they talk to you?
Also: I know you need to preserve your ears for music’s sake, but don’t complain that you can’t hear someone if you still have the freakin’ things in.
*sigh* People are unreasonable I have friends in bands in general as well as a few dj acquaintances and they all have some sort of basic protocol.It’s sadly a necessity.That or god forbid bouncer/bodyguard buffering which is more of a nuisance than simply asking people to be sensible.
It’s not mean or careless or rude to ask people to be respectful of each other and be patient.Musicians are just people too. We all have our limits on the amount of bs we can tolerate. Especially when it comes to people we care about getting upset or when we’re trying to work/deal with something important.
Frankly this just comes across as a reasonable request for people to be rational and respectful of each other with due patience.A wee bit of consideration goes a long way.
Hell, one of the bands I liked as a kid the singer liked smarties so we brought smarties with us for him.Guy always lit up like a little kid over that.Music may be entertainment but its work putting on a show.It’s exhausting and takes a lot of damn time.Hell some nights a cold bottle of water is a godsend.
Seriously, if you want the appreciation of another human being be considerate,grounded and rational. We all have the same basic wants and needs. Frankly, if its something you wouldn’t like don’t do it to another person and expect a positive outcome.
Hand signals are non-verbal communication that say something like wait or one second without interrupting an ongoing conversation to a large degree. Short of growing another head there isn’t much else he could really do.
It seems there’s an undertone of genuine appreciation and a bit of mirth in this post along with a polite request for orderly behavior.
Anyhow, hats off to ya for trying.
I agree with Morphine. I like your music, Faderhead, but this was pointless. A lot of fans won’t read your blog, and now you’re just going to be more irritated with not just these pet peeves, but the possibility that people are going to ignore all this and you’re going to notice more. That is all.
I think my approach may have needed some aid…I was the cake girl from Cybertron :P My friend Cyndi & I were making sure we hit all the band ppl/event folks/Djs etc with yumminess before splitting for the night…she may have poked ya to get your attention. I do apologize it she did so…we had a few words before you were stolen away by fans wanting pix with that please save me look on your face hehe…
anyway too funny love the blog…this is funny because I teach little ones by day 3 to 5 year olds…and this is something I am trying to teach them the polite interruption or waiting for that conversational pause..you’d think adults would have mastered this skill by now :)
I did wrote you not one but 2 e-mails…. never got an answer, although I’ve spoken to you two times (Madrid and Leipzig, at the WGT). I’ll see you on stage a third time I guess in Berlin next month. Anyway, everytime I’ve spoken to you you’ve been nice, polite and really funny, I guess because I followed this rules, didn’t poke you and have been patient (I agree with you. I HATE been poked by people, and people do this to me all the time, so I don’t poke anybody), but I think what you just said on your blog is something everybody should know.
I just disagree in one thing: people giving you their CDs maybe shows you a little bit how people cares about your opinion and help, and meybe you’re losing a great band with huge ideas who you can support and help. It’s just a thought and of course :)
Anyway, see you in Berlin at E-tropolis!
I think your requests here are totally reasonable at a practical level, but people in the US are quite oblivious at times when they’re drunk and having fun. Many here have been trained that if you’re too respectful or too passive, you’ll be put last. Poking, in a crowded club, OMG, sometimes that’s the ONLY way. A lot of what you’re asking may seem like common sense to you but it’s more likely you’re fans will not even realize they are insulting or upsetting you. Here, everyone is friends with everyone so interruption is standard fare. The worst thing you could probably do is call them on their failure to respect your boundaries having never met you before. They’ll see you as the jerk for making them out to be one. Maybe you don’t care and consider acceptable losses because you don’t need to deal with rude people. However, you never know when that guy in line you just pissed off was a radio DJ or a Hollywood producer who wanted to feature a track in a film, especially here.
You’re in a distinct advantage this time for this upcoming US tour. You have experienced how the US audiences are. It’s probably asking a lot more from the world to expect them to change for you than making a few keen accommodations yourself. All you need is to … be flexible, be understanding and just go with the moment as best you can without being confrontational. There is, a way to raise a finger in the air without eye contact that in a non-insulting way nondramatically communicates “give you a sec”. If people want to talk about gear, prepare a brief answer, but always answer. Is it really all that different that people with tattoos or piercings always get asked, “did that hurt?” People aren’t going to stop asking the question just because you don’t like answering the question any more. But it’s good to have it on your blog so those who want that answer can get it. If people want to give you a CD, make it part of your rider that says you’re not allowed to accept them so you can honestly tell fans, you’re not allowed to accept them. Anyway, you don’t need to regard these thoughts. I’m just laying it out there that it’s just as easy to not take too much offense and accept these ridiculous rude Americans and their quirks.
Hey, I met you after your show at Necto in Michigan a few months back. I asked you to sign my white Tripps. :DD You put on a hell of a show and I never thanked you for the experience.