“I am an airhead and I want to be in your video!”
Jesus fuckin’ Christ! What is wrong with you ladies???
We (Marco Ribbe and me) posted several casting calls on different websites 2 days ago. So far we received 15 email applications and 98 completely moronic emails like
- “I am 177cm tall, 2cm taller than what you are looking for. Can I still apply?” (hint: read the casting call!)
- “Will I get paid for travelling?” (hint: read the casting call!!)
- “I am only 17, so I am a year younger than you specify. Can I still apply?” (hint: read the casting call!!!)
- “Why did you have to choose that date for filming? It’s the most inconvenient date for me!” (hint: maybe it was very convenient for us and we didn’t factor in that some random girl who we’ve never met is busy during that time?)
- “Do you think I am too shy for this?” (hint: we have never met you before, how the fuck should we know???)
- “What kind of model are you looking for? Do you think I have a chance?” (hint: read the motherfucking casting call!!!)
And my favorite: “I am blonde, can I still apply?” …
We got 98 of those! Ninty-fuckin-eight!! In contrast to that out of the 15 young women who applied via email 3 were older than specified, two were definitely not anywhere near “lean” and only one, yes ONE (eine, una, une) actually did everything the way it was asked in the casting call (thank you Rebecca from Bochum, you are the only shining beacon of hope for me!!).
I don’t even want to mention the brainiacs who (despite the clear mention of applying through casting@faderhead.com) sent us stuff through myspace or a German modelling website. Reading comprehension failure anyone?
What is the point of this rant? The point is:
a) everything you need to know is in the casting call
b) if you are too stupid to figure out what’s written in the casting call – do you think we even WANT to work with you?
c) if you are too lazy to add everything we ask for (yes, I am talking about the short introductory video here!), then we surely won’t think that you’ll be putting any effort into this production at all. Do you think we’ll put any faith, weeks of work and a bunch of money into your lazy ass?
People are delusional morons these days, really. I can’t wait for all those small-town-scene-queens whose photoshopped cellulite ass has been in the Sonic Seducer Gothic Calendar 2005 (only after they sucked off the photographer!) to be bitching later “What? They chose HER??? *I* would have been soooo much better!” …
EDIT: I got the second proper application from a young lady named Ann-Katrin today!! Thank you!!! <3
Hehe, word. Reading comprehension is a skill that humanity lost somewhen in the last generation.
Seriously: What did you expect? You asked the Alternative scene as a whole, not a professional agency. You asked for people who want to get in front of a camera, not for top-flight chemists. Do you think that you are likely to be skimming of the intellectual cream? You think that even agencies don’t see this kind of thing every day? If Elite erected a signpost on a random street corner asking for a new supermodel, would they expect any better? Jeez: You’ve written at least two songs about this kind of thing; why the surprise.
Try Model Mayhem. It’s still not a professional agency, but it’s not Mywasteofspace, either.
Mike: this is not surprise. This is an attempt to lower the wash that will come in in the next 18 days.
Also which songs are you referring to?
OMG
I Know i probally shouldn´t but right now im Laughing my ass off.
But that said, walking trough Essen is probally as full of “Facepalm” Moments as reading those retarded Mails you´re getting at the moment. <.<
Maybe you should try that Casting stuff?
even if it´s not bearing fruit, you pobally could at least make a real Fun show out of it xD
xD…totally agree with Seek..:D..You should make a casting show out of it. Meanwhile you can also produce your video with the right girl..lol.. No seriously…there are to many akwards out there, i don’t wonder andymore…-.-..but what do you have expected?it’s this scene…it’s all about this ”look at me,i’m better than her”-blah..normal bitchy girls are annoying enough,but gothic annoying-bitchy-girls?omg..i would kill myself if i have to work with that kind of people. anyway….
I’m not lean at this time,cause i’m pregnant..lol..but if you’re searching for someone who is next time,text me….;D
I’m joking;)
Wish you good luck,btw. Keep your head up…there are also normal girls,just need some time to find a good one:)
xoxo
Heli
I am a female, can I still apply?
thx a lot. der eintrag hat mir auf jeden fall den nachmittag auf eine amüsante art und weise versüßt. einfach spitze xD viel erfolg noch und hoffentlich findest du noch etwas kompetentes
I’m too male, too old, too tall, too fat, have too many piercings and no haircolor, can I still apply? Video available if you look for “jungsklo reeperbahn” on youtube!!!111
Wow, man, that must’ve been a real pain %)
I hope you get less of that BS in the upcoming days, I really do )
Keep up and good luck! )
Maybe you could put out a call for guys as well, not to actually cast but so you can compare and see if it is gender specific, hair color specific or whatnot. There is research with merit and knowledge to be gained here!
Just three words – Oh My God!!!!
lol
Poor little airheads…
That’s pretty entertaining, but could definitely be expected. Will the girls you’re trying to avoid getting applications from actually read this addendum?
LOL I’m female, in the age range, and height range and I have a hair color…but I have a lot of tattoos and some piercings, and I’m not so disillusioned to call myself “slim” and I’m not going to Germany any time soon.
I am currently amused that my anti-spam word is “broad” though.
I was actually thinking about applying.
I am 1 cm taller as required so i decided NOT to apply.
But honestly? I was wondering if this 1 cm does matter so much. And it’s not about stupidity that i wondered. If someone is sending an email and asking questions you shouldn’t judge this person or look down at em for their behaviour or questions or fool around about em like “they should read the casting call” (obviously they did – otherwise they wouldn’t write and ask if a little differing would matter). Be thankfull they are not sending a bunch of videos you gonna watch, waste your time on it, might decide you want them and then you figure out (at the shoot) that they are 1 cm too tall. or you might will never find out if you don’t meassure them as soon as they step through the door.
you already wrote in your note “dark hair prefered” – so why should a blond girl believe she would have a real chance at all?
Or maybe you should write bold in your note without any differing from your requested requirements. people might wouldn’t think about it as the question of interpretation as you deal with laws. maybe by that you save your and their time
any way – good luck with your shoot. if you wanna fool around about this comment – go for it
H.Strong: what can I say?
The girls who asked these questions are either too stupid to read or have too little self-esteem. If you think that being 1cm too tall will disqualify you, then you don’t belong in such a project anyway.
Most of the women writing emails either just didn’t give two shits to even read the info or didn’t care enough to think about it and apply properly.
Nobody is wasting my time by sending a proper application, even if you are 1.45m, 150kg and bald. I can just look at it in 5 seconds and move on to the next. The sheer volume of retarded questions is what wastes my time!
HA!
i read your job surch on another page.
there it says dark hair preferred. not like here “any haircolor” – that would explain why girls are asking if blonde is ok…
especially because the color of hair is probably pretty easy to change…
communication is a gift and very powerfull. as more precisely your request gonna be as more usefull replies you will get
possibly
well – people think…
there could be reasons why you say ” – 175cm”, like the guy they need to kiss might be smaller then. there must be a reason otherwise you probably wouldn’T have chosen that meassurement…i read it. and hell yeah i have self-esteem.
i interpreted your requirements as no differing because i expect people to have reasons why they say something. so because i thought you think and have your reasons, i don’T belong in this project anyway? =) nice
Sami, you are fucking epic with rants xD
Good luck with the casting calls man, and hope to see the video soon =D
Maybe with a 177cm Blonde who’s not “lean” and is really shy? =P
H. Strong: thanks for your opinion, but I really have a hard time understanding your version of English. Seems like you have a hard time understanding German, because “egal” means “IT DOESN’T FUCKIN’ MATTER” …
Btw, have you noticed that everyone except the girls who wrote these emails think that the emails are dumb?
Guess not …
heieiei.
why are you not understanding my “version” of english?
quote:
“Voraussetzungen:
Alter: 18-30
Größe: 160cm – 175cm
Haarfarbe: egal – braun, schwarz bzw. dunkel etwas bevorzugt
Figur: schlank
Kleidergröße: 34-38 je nach Körpergröße”
maybe i have a hard time understanding your version of german. yes, it says “egal”, but also that dark hair is preferred. there are a billion (by far more dark haired people than blond). maybe you shouldn’t add the part of dark hair is preferred if it doesn’t matter?
right. you got 95 emails questioning how precisely your requirements have to be. and about – WHAT? maybe 11 people who are laughing about the way you talk about those girls and quote them? very representative. totally. that 11 people are “everyone” and the majority of girls replying to you is dumb (not to mention those who decided not to reply). it MUST be the stupid girls and doesn’t depend on a little lack of definition in your casting call. (if your more define – for example by adding an “exactly” or a “circa” to your requirements – you might get less stupid emails. – just a recommend)
and i don’t wanna get into why people who are not good looking, feel better and like to laugh about “stupidity” of good looking people. or like to reduce them to that.
and yes – there is an example why no girls (or people) reply here who does have another opinion than you do. there was a woman in new york who got killed on the street while 38 people were watching. noone was helping and noone called the police. not because noone would have done that in general. she would have been more lucky if there would have been just one person instead of 38. but because noone was acting everybody else wasn’t acting either.
it’s the mass of people. in publishing you lern about the hold once tongue spiral. it tells you that an opinion can shift by people who act in public. for example during the second world war. it’s not that everyone supported hitler or agreed to his politics and acting. actually at the beginning it were just a few. but those were loud and making propaganda. people who had another opinion believed, that they are the minority group even they were the majority. in the end it shifted and more and more people alternate. if someone would have stood up at the beginning and spoke for the “real” mass of people – and not the felt mass – it might would never come to the second world war.
so trust me, because people laugh here doesn’t say anything about the MASS of people. its easier to laugh about someone and with someone on a public board like this than to disagree. people are afraid to humilate themself by taking the other side.
but i’m sure….you are right. all girls replying are dumb and everyone who has an easy life to laugh about someone is THE majority… I’m glad to be in the know now. changed my life =)
You Know, this is kind of fun.
But Seriously you Guys are talking at cross-purposes.
What´s so hard to understand on the Fact that Sami isnt getting proper applications but one stupid Mail, tweet, PM or What so Freaking Ever?
And thast what we are making fun of, those retardet timewasting questions.
So Lets Say Youre a girl, 176cm tall, Blonde and lean.
Well Yeah you’re not ecxatly what has been asked for in the Call, but still you could send in a proper Application, including fotos or a video and maybe could still get the “Job”.
If you dont have Faith in you’re self or you think you dont have the least chance of getting the Role, than leave it be.
So Basicly Said: even if You are not whats been specified in the Call, Send in a Proper Application or not, but stop asking retarded Questions through all kind of Social Networks, because it is just a waste Of time!
Is that so hard to understand?
Sry for repeating you’re words in a new makeover Sami
I know. i hear you.
i was recommending what should be in the casting call because often when there are requirements you have to follow them exactly. – so if you would write that in the casting call you probably wouldn’t get those emails.
some people might don’t have a camera and wanna know if they have a chance at all before THEY put lots of efford in it and it’s just wasted time. you want them to put efford in it, make a video and stuff like that. for them it’s time consuming as well. noone wanna waste time in case there is no chance at all.
Ok then Lets try an Analogy here,
If You’re reading a job offer, saying:
We are looking for Applicants bitween 18 an 25,
with highshool Diploma, and expierence in Windows Word, Excel…
to start at first of april.
So now you would Like to applicate, are 25 and will become 26 on 31st of march, and the expierence in word and excel you are able to allocate is limited to basics you learnd in School. (although you might be a real Pro since you Learnd it all on Youre Own)
What would you do?
Call the job offering Company and tell em: “like his ‘n like that” can i Still apply? (and risk leave a bad first impression because the ppl. may think you can not read probaly)
Or would you put in some effort, and send them an Application that really Shows off what you got, even though you dont have the Paper sayin “master of Word ‘n Excel”.
so what im trying to say is,
In both Cases it´s an do or dont.
Even if they tell you Yeah u could have a chance, you will never know if you really do.
Sure no one wants to Waste precious time, but no pains no gains.
“This is an attempt to lower the wash that will come in in the next 18 days.”
I’m somewhat cynical that any bimbo electing to not read the casting call will read a rant and in any way think that it pertains to them. But I admire your optimism!
“Also which songs are you referring to?”
‘Hey, Girl’ and ‘Girly Show’ were the ones that sprung immediately to mind and which are gloriously harsh, but ‘Electrosluts Extraordinaire’ counts as well, I’m guessing.
Mike
Seeing your last videos with all the girls actually made me wonder if the world rotates the other way round in your part of Germany. So while i feel your pain here, i’m kinda relieved by the fact that internet models really are crappy everywhere.
What they want is not information about the flexibility of your body height limits, that is only a bait suckering you into a 50-message conversation about really any self-explanatory part of the production right down to “should it have a goth look?”. Only to end up in their grandmother dying on shooting day or some other freaky shit that makes any effort put into them a waste of time.
Solved it by shooting friends, they also look great when dressed up and bring a good time for added benefit. You have a zillion fans who are not self proclaimed models and still look awesome, go for them. Require girls to know five FH songs – you’ll only get fans or people who learned them by heart, but that at least assures they have the cognitive capacity to connect the voice in their head to your lips moving
Seek: thank you, thank you, thank you! You got it EXACTLY right.
Chris Maestro: The world is exactly the same everywhere. We had so much trouble organizing big scenes with 30 people on a miniscule budget, it was unreal. The problem is: I’ve shot with all my friends so often already. If you look at the videos, you’ll see the same people show up everywhere
But you are TOTALLY right about the 50-message-convo bullshit with the granny dying on shooting day. That’s exactly the point.
Mike: you gotta have optimism! Otherwise nothing will ever happen! Depressed people usually aren’t in the higher productivity bracket
– we also linked the rant at the top of the model directory casting call and it’s gotten better since!
H. Strong: please read what Seek wrote and if you think that typing up a short email (5 minutes), adding some photos (5 minutes) and recording a short video with your webcam (5 minutes) is “a lot of effort” for a paid job, then I wish you good luck in your version of the world …
If sense was common, more people would have it …
Dear Sami. It’s not funny. Maybe this applications eally was funny but such public malice towards those girls it is unfair. maybe this girls are funny, but You’re not gentelman.
Never said I was a gentleman …
TLDR much of the long ass comments,
but Sami, well put.